Like in a game, you need to know the rules
if you want to be part of it
All ignorants will be losers
Doesn't matter how honest they are.
I'm not a referee or a coach.
It's not my job to explain,
to warn, to fix people's mistakes.
People who already know the rules,
don't need to explain how good they are.
It will show on the field.
One day, we will be out of it.
Maybe you already are.
I'll accept to be a loser.
I don't need to tell myself a fairy tale
to feel better about myself.
I feel old. I become impatient.
Impatient to the people who are at my stage
Sometimes, I feel like I'm not where I'm supposed to be
But I look at this kid and I know.
I know I wanna be a father, doesn't matter where it will be.
I wanna teach him what I know, teach him what I couldn't do.
Make him happier than I am.
I know I want it but not at any price.
Weird is how I feel right now.
A mix of thoughts. An Image in my head. A song.
I remember this girl. 8 Years ago.
I don't know if I'm idealizing.
Probably I am. I wanna find her again.
But I'll be fine if I don't, leaving her on the top my pyramid
Right now, I wish I could talk or listen to somebody.
Somebody that would make more effect than the four walls of my room
Someone was right. I'm not myself. I never was.
There is no myself. Everything is all adjustments.
Have I ever had a choice?
Vietnamese, son of someone who left his country himself at 19.
Born in Belgium, grew up where I was almost like one of a kind and living now in U.S? What was she expecting?
There is no myself. There is me today. There will be a me tomorrow, sligthly different.
Sometimes, i know I'm cold, like frozen to myself.
It's not hatred, sadness or carelesness.
I would call it melancholy, spleen or whatever.
It's a feeling where nothing around seems to be real
nothing around has a meaning, like I'm alone in the room
I'm gonna stop here, and finish this Smirnoff...To be continued.
Anh Phi




